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GAHHH -.-

The feeling arrives again, hunger. As I debate weather or not to eat, I inhale. "when you starve yourself then eat once your body gets worried and stores it all as fat" well then I wont eat. I lay in bed, I love the feeling. It hurts but at the same time I know what its doing. I would never eat if people would leave me alone about it. "its not healthy starving yourself you know." yeah. I know, but do I care? Not really. I inhale once again and look at my wall. All these people love me. I wish they could understand. I roll over as the gurgling in my stomach proceeds as always. And I try to lay on it so it shuts up. That's the only thing I cant stand of this, the rumbling. Its so annoying. I sit up and go into the kitchen for some water. Water always makes it shut up. "Oh, do you want some macaroni hun?" my mom chimes in on my thoughts. "No thanks." I mumble as I get a glass. "you haven't eaten all day ana." "I'm not hungry mom." She knows my plan. "Ana, I'm really worried about you." I ignore her as I fill my glass up. "you know I could put you in the hospital again." "Mom, I'm fine. Get off my back, ill eat later. Okay?" she huffs. "whatever ana, starve yourself I don't care anymore." She quit caring along time ago, but since he's been gone she's trying to win mother of the year award for blowing us off that whole year. "yeah? Just like you didn't care if the government took me away for not going to school? Then got all worried at court?" "that was different ana, this could kill you." she rambles on as I sip my water. I finally get fed up with it and take a bite of her macaroni and cheese. "happy mommy?" as I walked out of the kitchen. I couldn't see, but I'm almost positive she rolled her eyes. I get online to see if anyone's on and wants to hang out. Lose weight now! Buy 15 days get 15 days free! that's all this worlds coming to, obese people and weight loss adds. No ones on, I hurry into my room before my mom can stab at me some more.

 

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